A family is completed through the China  Child of Promise program

by Kim Esser

My husband and I went to an informational meeting on adoption in our hometown in 2006. We have three wonderful kids but were open to adding to the family through adoption. After the meeting we immediately started in on the paperwork.

As the one-year anniversary of our log-in date approached we saw the wait time increase triple fold. What were we to do? Stay in the process? Drop out? Switch to special needs?

In the end, we decided to go the China Child of Promise route. My husband and I filled out a minor/correctable needs checklist and then compared our lists, deciding on needs that we thought we could handle. We filed the paperwork in late August 2008 and three weeks later we had our referral! She was a beautiful little girl, about to turn one that week, and she was missing some fingers on her left hand…that was it!

We immediately said, “Yes! This is our child!” and started the process to bring Seren SuPing home. It seemed like everything then took the long route but in reality we were on our way to China in February 2009 to bring home our girl!

Seren SuPing has added so much joy to our family,and we can’t imagine life without her. If you are a family trying to decide if the Child of Promise program is right for you, take that leap of faith. In reality, you are the ones in control because you decide what “special needs” you are open to. There was never any pressure from Holt, and they never tried to persuade us into needs that we weren’t open to.

Holt wants you to feel comfortable with what you decide upon and only wants what is best for the children. I look at our new daughter and can’t imagine not having her. She fits our family perfectly and has made us all appreciate what we have and what we do as a family.

The joys and struggles of adopting an older child from China

by Dannah Gresh

I am an adoptive mother struggling to reach into the recesses of a broken heart—that of my precious fifteen-year-old daughter, Autumn. She is in her bedroom writing too. She is having a bad day. Having been adopted at the age of thirteen, she misses China today. I encourage her to write her emotions in the pages of a journal. Some of her thoughts are too private. She writes those in Chinese so I cannot read them. I feel as if those Chinese characters represent an ancient code within her that I have to crack to find her healing. I’m fairly certain it is going to take me a lifetime to read her.

In 2004 God opened our family to the idea of adoption. We were on a mission trip in Zambia and fell in love with more than one orphaned child. We prayed: “God, if you want us to adopt, we are willing. Drop a child into our lap and make it clear.” He did, and when He did our hearts had been marinating in the call for two years.

In 2006 my husband’s best friend Troy VanLiere called him. He’d just come from China where he and his wife, Donna had adopted two girls a few years earlier. He sent a photo of Autumn to my husband’s laptop

Troy explained: “All she wants is a mom and dad, but in eleven months she’ll age-out and won’t be adoptable. What should I do?” Before we knew it, we realized that God was dropping a child into our laps…and she was thirteen.

Adopting an older child from another country is a drastically unique experience. The school systems don’t really know how to advise you educationally. Even the very experienced child psychologist who works with us doesn’t have any similar case studies, and so doesn’t always know how to advise me.

Once Autumn shut down emotionally to Lexi, her teenaged sister, and we couldn’t figure out why. After three months, we finally learned that it stemmed from a moment of sibling rivalry in which I intervened. After giving the girls time to figure it out, I quipped: “That’s enough. This isn’t working!” Lexi correctly interpreted it to mean: “If we don’t negotiate a plan here, mom will!” Autumn thought it meant I was taking her back to China, and so chose to not interface with Lexi in an attempt to stay. It’s complicated and if you aren’t willing to roll up your sleeves and stay in the game, don’t consider it. On difficult days, you’ll have to believe without a doubt that this was a calling for you and your family.

How can you know if it is? Continue Reading »

A family takes an adaptive approach to the unexpected events of their adoption

by Colleen Thompson

My husband and I adopted our younger daughter, Celia, in 2006 through what is now known as the China Child of Promise program. Like many families, we started out in the standard program, and then switched tracks shortly after, as we learned more about this wonderful program.

Through our adoption experience, we learned some helpful lessons along the way.

Lesson 1: Embrace the information you receive, but don’t expect it to be complete.

Celia had a congenital limb abnormality of her left foot. After accepting the referral, Holt’s China staff got us updated photos of Celia - including close-ups of her foot - which we shared with our pediatrician. We knew Celia was not yet standing on her own, but our doctor’s initial assessment reassured us that Celia’s limb difference need not have a significant impact on her physical development.

What we didn’t know was that, during the three months we waited to travel, Celia was developing another medical condition that would prove much more challenging.

Lesson 2: Set realistic expectations for your own emotional well-being.

Being a “glass-half-full” sort, I was naturally drawn to all the heartwarming, feel-good stories of adoptive families. Without realizing it, I had created a fantasy in my own mind of how our story would play out.

By the time of our referral, Steve and I felt well prepared to accept Celia into our family. We completed the “Parents in Process”, read all the recommended books on attachment and bonding in adoption, and did our best to prepare our daughter, Sawyer, to become a jiejie.

Celia bonded with us quickly. Continue Reading »

by Michele Mazzio

Adoption was something that my husband and I talked about many years ago, particularly after we lost our son, Brendan, to SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) in 2001. After a long grief process we started to explore and research domestic and international adoption. We discussed the programs and met with various people who had adopted internationally.

As a teenage girl I dreamed of having a little girl from China, and my husband was open to this, as well. After a little over a year of paperwork and wait time, we adopted our daughter, Emma from the Province of Guangdong in 2005. After so many years of empty hearts and arms we held our healthy 15-month old little girl. We were so excited and thrilled to have been blessed by this gift.

Emma is now an amazing 5-year-old girl who loves to hula-hoop, do gymnastics, play the piano and just enjoy life every day. As her pre-K teacher tells her: “You are the sunshine in my classroom.” She has certainly been my sunshine and warms my heart every day. Emma has taught us so much more about love and life and the importance of family.  She has even taught me how to parent a child after the loss of another.

My husband and I decided that we wanted to take another journey back to China and adopt another little girl. We completed our paperwork and submitted our dossier to China in 2006. At the time we knew that the wait would be longer than before but not that the wait time would get extended each month that went by.

One day I was reading an article about Holt’s Child of Promise Program and about little boys who need families, too. When I think about adoption from China, I only naturally think about the little girls. I had never thought about adopting a boy from China.

My husband and I discussed the program and explored the possibility of being open to adopting a boy. After so many years had gone by and having my broken heart mended by my beautiful daughter, we called Holt and told them that we would like to be considered as a prospective family in the China Child of Promise Program, and in addition, that we preferred adopting a boy with a mild, correctable medical condition.

I’ll never forget the day I spoke to Brian Bradford at Holt.  He was so happy to hear that we were open to adopting a boy. Furthermore, he told me that it could be a matter of weeks until we received a phone call (something I couldn’t comprehend after waiting for 2 years). We submitted our medical checklist in November and received the phone call in December about a 13-month-old little boy with clubfeet.

After contacting pediatric orthopedic doctors about the severity of his feet and condition, we were told that he has a mild case of clubfeet and would be easily corrected by serial casting and braces. We knew this was the child that we had long waited for.

For me it was that opportunity to provide a life to a little boy that we couldn’t give to our biological son. We left for China in April. Words cannot even express how much love I have for Daniel. He is truly an amazing boy and has shown me once again that life should be lived with joy and happiness. Daniel has gone through a lot since we brought him home, but he laughs and smiles every day. He completed a month and a half of serial casting for his feet and is now wearing his braces. He will only need to wear the braces at night after about a year, until he is about 3. Our two children have truly blessed us, and I never thought how much my life would be completed by my family.

I am writing this article not only to share our story with you, but also to connect with those who are willing to open their hearts to the little boys who need good homes, too. If you can open your hearts and minds, adopting a boy can be a significantly rewarding and memorable experience, as it has for us.

by: David and Jennifer Lotspeich

“Have you considered a boy? Boys in China with minor needs are in great need of loving families,” said our Holt social worker, Judy.

Have you ever been driving, just enjoying the trip and almost missed your turn? You slam on the brakes-hopefully there is no one behind you-and you just barely make your turn. This phrase hit us just like that. My husband and I started our process in January 2008 thinking like most that we would receive a little girl.

“A boy?” We hadn’t even considered a boy.” I had my mind set on pigtails and frilly dresses, not cut off jeans and ball caps. I got on the Holt message board and asked other China families to post pictures of their little men. One look and my husband and I were hooked.

For the next six months we were always working on something. Working on our dossier, applying for grants or working on additional fundraising. At times it seemed overwhelming, but in June we heard those life-changing words: “We have a little boy we think would be a good match for you.” To hear those words, and even to remember hearing them almost makes me weak in the knees.

From June until November we prepared to bring our Jonathan home. I painted bedrooms and held bake/garage sales. David had the large responsibility of applying for additional grants and no interest loans. We placed Jonathan’s picture on our refrigerator, and he became a part of our everyday conversation.

One day I made conge because his referral said that he ate it everyday. I tried to bring a little bit of China to our family. My children still have not acquired a taste for it. As each day passed, my heart longed to hold him more and more. Then in early October we received our travel dates. As I type and reflect, the word that comes to mind is “surreal.” All of our work and preparation with this day in mind, and it was finally here.
The very next day we started making plans, buying tickets, making freezer meals and the list went on and on.

We left the day before Thanksgiving and received our Jonathan on November 30th. After that day, China was still enjoyable, but as you can imagine, it was also very difficult.

Jonathan was very sad and most of the time had a very confused expression, which broke our hearts. Now that we look back on it, if we were able to go back in time we would have educated ourselves more thoroughly about bonding issues with adopted children, especially those over a year old.

For the next five months we struggled a great deal with bonding. Not only was Jonathan going through the grieving process, but he was also trying to find his place in our family as we were getting familiar with him. My advice: educate yourself about everything. Talk to other families that have gone before you and gain a support system. It may be one of the most difficult things you have ever done, but like the saying goes, “This too shall pass.” Jonathan has now been home for 6 months and 10 days. He continues to go through the grieving process and has both good and bad days like any other toddler, but he is our Jonathan, and our life is by far much richer with him in it.

My husband and I chose to be open to adopting a boy because you do not get to choose your biological children. You are simply blessed with what God has given you. We saw our adoption the same way…and we have been blessed with Jonathan.

by SueAnn Rand

I got “the itch” shortly after my husband and I decided for sure that we were not having any more children. We were so very blessed to have three healthy, beautiful daughters. What more could we ask for? I had the itch, nonetheless, and after discussing our many options, adoption seemed to call to us.

Our decision to adopt another girl was not even a decision really, though we would have been happy with a boy if we had one anywhere along the way, that was not the path chosen for us. Girls are just what we know and do best.

What a great life experience for our very lucky daughters and a wonderful opportunity for us to grow as a family while reaching out to a little girl halfway around the world.

A friend of a friend had adopted three children from China through Holt, and that was all we needed to hear, Holt was our choice. After starting the paper chase in April 2007, our dossier was logged in with China in June. After a few months, we were very discouraged to hear of the increasing wait times for adoption within China.

We had heard a little about the China Child of Promise option but didn’t really think it was right for us - quite frankly it scared me! After exploring it a little and learning that we were in control of the types of special needs we were willing to consider, we decided to fill out the minor/correctable needs conditions list.

By the time we were finished researching the different conditions, it seemed we hadn’t really selected many that we were ok with, but we finally submitted our list to Holt in December. I’ve always believed things work out the way they are supposed to, and I knew our perfect fate was waiting.

Just four months later, I got “the call” at work and was overwhelmed with excitement, nervousness and anxiousness. As I listened to the details of our new daughter, I was overcome with joy! I called my husband to tell him the news and anxiously awaited the email with the official written information from Holt, and the pictures of course!

After a delay in getting the email (it seemed like DAYS, but was actually just a few hours), we KNEW she was our daughter. Xi Nian Qiong was born October 12, 2007 in Kunming, China. She was found the day she was born and taken to the local orphanage. She was born with a small hole in her heart and a tiny bump above her right eyebrow. Our wonderful physician reviewed her file for us very late that night and gave us the medical “ok”.

The hole in her heart was likely to heal on its own and if not, would require a very minor procedure to fix, and the bump above her eyebrow was likely purely cosmetic. We received an update in July that she was living with a foster family - this was very exciting news! We also received additional photos - what an incredibly beautiful baby we were to be blessed with.

We left for China in September, and were united with Calista Hope, on Sunday, September 21, 2008. Words cannot describe the emotions of that day. What an absolutely perfect little girl we were chosen to be the forever family for.

We had a wonderful trip, with Holt guiding us and helping us every step of the way. At the medical check-up in Guangzhou, we were told her heart had healed. We were very excited but wanted to wait until we returned to the US to confirm this. Upon our return, our physician did indeed confirm that her heart had healed on its own and the tiny bump was purely cosmetic and nothing needed to be done with it. We were blessed with a perfectly healthy little girl AND shortened our wait time incredibly.

We had our daughter home with us by October, just a short 18 months from our initial (non China Child of Promise) application to Holt.

If you are even thinking about the Child of Promise option, go ahead and fill out the medical conditions list - you have NOTHING to lose and a beautiful child to gain! Calista fits in with our family perfectly. There is no doubt that she was born into this world to be a Rand girl!

Please feel free to contact me at SABRmeow@aol.com if you’d like to ask any questions. Sincerely, SueAnn Rand

Director of Services, China Program

Dear China Families:

Holt International continues to see many children joining adoptive families through our China Child of Promise program-matching over 150 children with parents since January. This is just amazing, and it makes me so happy to know that children from China with minor, correctable needs are finally in permanent, loving homes.

However, Holt desperately needs families who will open their hearts and consider adopting a boy with minor, correctable needs.  Currently there are very few families who have indicated openness to either gender. Boys in China need loving families just as much as girls, and we at Holt want to give these beautiful children every opportunity to experience the joy and love of a permanent family. Opening your options to consider a boy could decrease your wait time drastically and put you well on your way to bringing home a son from China.

If you are currently in the China Child of Promise program and have not expressed willingness to consider either gender, I urge you consider a boy waiting to come home to a loving family. Contact Brian Bradford for more information on how you can adopt a son from China.

I hope you will read the stories below from families who have adopted sons from China. I hope they serve as an inspiration to you and perhaps encourage you to consider bringing home a boy who desperately needs a family.

Sincerely,

Beth Smith
Director of Services
China Program

By: Sean Yarger

My wife April and I started to get a little impatient while waiting to adopt a child from China. It was at this point she first approached me about joining the China Child of Promise program, and after much discussion we made the decision to join.

April was addicted to every international adoption forum on the Internet, and she used these sources to gather tons of information about every kind of special need there is. She also made friends through the local adoption support groups whose babies had one special need or another.

Through her research we decided to check the box for “heart condition” on Holt’s minor/correctable conditions checklist. We figured that if a baby had a heart condition and was still adoptable, the condition must be readily treatable and the baby would have a good prognosis.

After making that mental leap, April spent a lot of time learning about the various kinds of heart conditions that a baby could have and the seriousness and treatment options for those conditions. When our referral finally came, she asked a doctor from Colorado Springs to evaluate her charts and he explained the risks thoroughly to her, which gave us the decision making criteria we needed to proceed. Through this, I learned way more than I ever expected to. Even still, I was admittedly less prepared than April for the challenges that lay ahead.

We made the heart-wrenching decision to turn down our first referral.  Imagine waiting for two years, deciding to switch to China Child of Promise, only then to decide against the first referral you get.

The problem was we live at 7,500ft, and the little girl who was referred had a heart condition incompatible with high altitude. As hard as it was, she wasn’t to be ours. We still pray every day for her continued good health and hope that she’s in the hands of a loving family who live at sea level.

We had planned to make preparations for our future daughter’s eventual heart surgery, when we were matched with Ava, and discovered that she had already had open-heart surgery to repair a condition called TOF, or Tetrology of Fallot. This is a condition also known as “Blue Baby Syndrome” in which one of the ventricles of the heart is sufficiently constricted as to cause lessened blood flow to the lungs. Whenever she would laugh or cry, she would turn blue. In her case, it had gotten to the point that surgery was absolutely necessary, so in March of 2008 her orphanage flew her 1,700km from Maoming City to a university hospital in Hangzhou, near Shanghai. Love Without Boundaries, an organization we are forever indebted to, funded the entire operation.

We learned that the procedure and recovery was very touch-and-go for a while. The nanny who accompanied her was concerned that she might not make it. Well, not only did she make it, but she is full of color, energy, and wonderment. By the time we got her, you would never know that she’d ever had a life threatening condition apart from the 5-inch scar on her chest.

Back home, we finally took her to see our doctor in person. His staff performed an ultrasound and EKG and gave us a much more personalized evaluation.

Prognosis? She’ll live a long and healthy life. “She probably won’t be an Olympian”, he explained as we all gazed at the U.S. Olympic Training Center across the street from his office, “but she’ll run and exercise along with all the other kids.”

Our doctor explained that she would ultimately require another open-heart surgery. She’ll need check-ups and have the surgery in maybe a year, maybe 14 years, we just don’t know.

Six months went by and we made our second visit to the cardiologist. Although Ava’s heart is still performing well, we’ve learned that her artery is still somewhat constricted and have planned for a routine surgery coming this April. She will have a catheter placed through her thigh up through her pulmonary artery. The doctor will then do some measurements and attempt to inflate a little balloon to widen the artery. If that doesn’t work, he will place a stint in there to widen it permanently. It’s a serious procedure but still considered routine, which is comforting to us. No doubt we’ll be nervous wrecks anyway.

Ava has fit right in to our family. Our four boys responded really well to her. Of course, we’d been priming them for 2 ½ years so they were beyond ready.

When asked about how Ava is adjusting to her new family, we always laugh and say that it’s us who are adjusting. April pretty much knew what to expect, but I had become accustomed to a life with four boys, and the freedom that comes with children that are starting to become self-sufficient.

Then one day about two months ago I walked through the door and heard an ear-piercing “DAAAADDYYYY!” followed by a tackle at the knees from my daughter’s running hug. There are things this little girl brings to the family that we have never experienced from our boys. There’s the never-ending affection. You can never give too many hugs or kisses to a daughter and she always wants more. She’s learned to adore Jesus on the Cross and always wants me to lift her up so she can kiss Him. 

Then there’s the humor, and there’s a lot of that. She gets crazy and runs around screaming with the boys - except that she’s still a wobbly toddler and crashes a lot. Most of it of course is on purpose. Being the stoic little girl she is, this never causes any pain, it’s just material for her physical comedy act. As we roll over laughing, she does it more and more.

It has been an absolute joy to watch her not only learn to speak English, but to learn to speak at all, perhaps it’s because every breakthrough in communication means a breakdown of a difficulty. The more she can express herself, the more relaxed we all are. Things are shaping up nicely and I find myself getting very excited at the anticipation of her joyous scream when I walk through the door.
I’ve had to re-learn that toddlers require sacrifices, and to put aside hobbies and selfish whims. This is especially true with a child who has a medical condition, but in her case we often take it for granted because she keeps up with the boys as though she was born perfectly healthy.

If we were to offer advice to anyone considering adopting through Holt’s China Child of Promise program, the most important thing we could say is to throw caution to the wind and go for it. We were very fortunate that the hard part was already done when we got our daughter, so that has made the switch to special needs easier on us; however, families have so much to offer these kids.

While in China, a lady in our travel group had gotten a child missing a hand. One morning at breakfast we watched as the girl tied a perfect bow in a ribbon with only one hand and the stub of another. To our amazement, she had adapted to life without one hand. She had showed that it was no big deal for her, but “special needs” can sound like such a big deal to us. Certainly, a heart condition is a very serious special need, but we’ve learned that in most cases, the procedures to repair them are very routine.

Those in our travel group who were like us and held out for a “healthy” child for so long all regretted waiting. In the end the medical condition seemed so trivial compared to the love and life you can offer these kids, and they will give back to you in ways you never expected.

In our case, the attachment breakthroughs have always happened after what are seemingly the most traumatic doctor visits. Recently, we had to do a complete blood panel for Ava. Her blood coagulated so fast that they had to stick her FIVE times! She howled in pain every time while I held her and they stuck her. After finally getting all the blood we agreed together that it was “all done” (she actually spoke it), and we left. She began to sleep better at night after that and the next doctor visit was an absolute breeze. Obviously she is feeling safer and more comfortable knowing that we will be there for her.

For us, each milestone makes us fall deeper in love with Ava. She’s had a rocky past, but she’ll have an amazing future. Who knows, this one-time open-heart surgery patient may herself become a heart surgeon later in life and be able to affect so many people in positive ways. Maybe she’ll be the next Florence Nightingale or Mother Teresa. We wonder about stuff like that all the time as we enjoy her. How could you not? One thing’s for sure, she’s cemented forever as part of our family and although she has different biological parents, she’s just our daughter, our boys’ sister. We love her like all of them.

For a very detailed account of our adoption journey to China, feel free to visit our website:

http://www.myadoptionwebsite.com/ourYaYa/index.html

View the minor/correctable conditions checklist

By: Melinda Richards

Ron and I were waiting for our healthy baby girl, like many other families adopting from China. We are an older couple, 46 and 50 respectively, and we were hopeful to add to our family soon. My 21-year-old daughter was also anxiously anticipating the arrival of a baby sister. In the beginning of 2008 we contacted our social worker and found out that we might be waiting another two years! She asked if we were willing to consider adopting a child with a minor medical need. And would we be open to a boy?

Our decision to pursue adoption through Holt’s China Child of Promise option was guided by yet another pull at our heartstrings. We had the means, access to top medical care, and just the right amount of strength and love to meet his needs. And a boy! What an incredible surprise!

We received a referral for Nate within three weeks from submitting the paperwork. Ron and I reviewed his extensive medical records and photos while eating a Chinese takeout dinner. Liu Qizhou, 15 months old, repaired cleft lip, bright-eyed and full of gumption. Was this our child? We were searching for a sign. Lo and behold, we opened a fortune cookie and read: “Your ability to love will help a child in need.”

The journey to Nathan has been full of anticipation and unknowns. He is healing well from palate surgery that took place in September, and now that he is two, we are all immersed in the endless flowing energy from our forever son. Certainly, our path to Nathan has led us to a true celebration of gratitude.
View the China Child of Promise Photo Gallery….

By: Ivy Shaffer-Marks

When a tiny, sweet 11-month-old baby girl was placed in my arms, she quickly looked back at the only faces she had known and started to cry. I wrapped my arms around her tightly and tried to console her soft whimpers. My emotions took over, and tears of joy streamed down my face. At that moment I knew that this was my daughter.

Two months after we switched to Holt’s China Child of Promise option we had a child. Her cleft lip had been repaired, and she still needed her palate repaired. Other issues such as hearing and speech were not a big concern because of reassuring medical updates. To us, this baby was the most beautiful child we had ever seen.

Since her arrival home a year ago, we have had many more wonderful moments as we watch our daughter learn to speak and grow into a spunky toddler.

There is so much to say about the China Child of Promise option; I simply do not have enough accolades for the program nor the staff that seemed to hold my hand during the entire trip. For me, a dream had come true; I finally had a child, a little girl. We named her Kira.

I can only encourage future parents to consider this option as a wonderful means to find your forever child. Our lives are so full of happiness and love for our daughter; we would definitely choose this option again.

Journey Through Adoption (April 2007-March 2009)

April 2007–Dani and I are ecstatic about this very personal decision to adopt and elated beyond words that one day in our future a little girl, born half way across the world, will wait for us to become her forever parents. This is a journey that involves love, patience and finding the inner strength to endure the seemingly endless months of waiting. Currently we are six months since our dossier was sent to China, and every month brings us closer to our little ladybug!

Why do I call her our Ladybug? It’s easy. One day this past fall, I came home from work and found all these pretty little ladybugs flying about our front door. I smiled to myself as I know that ladybugs bring good fortune and hoped that this was a Red Thread Connection to our daughter. Yes, there are definitely connections that only those of us in this process can relate to.

July 2007–I am going to try and mark this month as a true milestone in our adoption process. As I said earlier, most women would have already delivered at nine months, while those of us in the adoption journey endure a longer pregnancy. However, with a bit of humor, faith and patience, we are all hoping this wait shortens up.

August 2007*–My husband came home to tell me that he had called Holt to let them know we were willing to consider a child with medical issues. This meant that we would not lose our place in line for a child who had no identified special healthcare needs, and our dossier would be pulled from the waiting pile and reviewed in this new light.

We told Holt that we preferred a younger girl with cleft lip/cleft palate. We anticipated a referral anywhere from three to six months after Holt received their next dossiers of waiting children, and we could only hope that there would be a little girl waiting for us. Truthfully, I could no longer bear watching the standard match wait list get longer every month.

September 2007*–I got a call from my husband saying that Holt had offered us a referral of a little 8-month-old girl from Hunan province. She had a repaired cleft lip, but would need palate surgery. I remember laughing and crying at the same time while trying to remain calm. Of course Dani couldn’t wait to open the file and see her picture, and after he did, I made him describe every detail. He said her face brought tears to his eyes and that “this was our baby.”

We reside in New Jersey and have access to the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP), their International Adoption team and the cleft lip and palate team. We had the doctor review our daughters’ medical documents before we signed the final paperwork. We also asked Holt if they had another adoption specialist we could run questions through and indeed we were provided with a physician in Chicago, who listened to my concerns and said: “Go get your daughter.” With that said, we started to pack!

*Excerpts from the Winter 2008 edition of Holt International magazine

January 7th 2008 (Gotcha Day)– Dani and I set out on a 2-hour flight to Changsha, Hunan in the early afternoon. The Assistant Director of Kira’s orphanage brought her to the Civil Affairs office which was a 3-hour long bus trip, so I wasn’t expecting a very happy “hey Mom, where have you been all this time”, a smile would have sufficed.

Needless to say, we were prepared for Kira’s anxiety as well as ours. I could see Kira with her caretakers as we approached the office. She seemed so content after a long day…then the “hand off” took place.

It took two caretakers to pry Kira away from them and give her to me. She just cried and cried and kept looking for the only familiar faces she knew. I knew how much we loved her, but she had no idea who we were and why she was leaving the only people she knew. At one point I handed her back to the caregiver.. As Kira calmed down, another caregiver showed me the original note that Kira was found with, as well as the hat she was wearing. I couldn’t believe they saved them; it will be such a special keepsake for Kira. The little hat and note took me completely off guard and made me think of her birth mother, who knew she had to relinquish her because of her cleft lip and palate. Well, obviously that’s a story to tell Kira when she is older.

Now as I sit and write this journal a tiny little girl, our daughter, is sleeping soundly in her little crib behind me. It feels so good; I just can’t believe she is ours!

January 16th 2008–We had to get up very early this morning to fly back to Beijing where we will leave for home tomorrow. We are so exhausted and happy and can’t wait to get home. We have met some of the most incredible people along this journey, most of whom I will always remember. We feel that not only did we adopt our daughter, but an entire group of families and their children as well.

March 2008–Today all I could do is watch as the nurse took my baby girl back to the operating room to have her palate repaired. All I know is that despite the fact she got “giggle juice” she wasn’t giggling and just stared at me with those big brown eyes as I tried not to cry.

Though this is a much-needed surgery that will allow her to speak and eat properly, I was still worried and couldn’t wait till it was over. The moment the doctor came out and said he was finished, I think I finally unclenched my teeth. All I can say is the Cleft Lip/Palate Team at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP) are incredibly gifted professionals and knew not only how to treat Kira, but her parents, as well. Our plastic surgeon was wonderful and so was the staff.

October 2008–Just a few minutes ago I spotted a ladybug in the window. I pointed it out to Kira who loves ladybugs and she stared at it till she crawled all the way up out of sight! The oddest thing is that today I am participating in Holt’s Webinar to talk about my process in the China Child of Promise program. In addition we are considering a sister for Kira, just not sure when the timing will be right. Perhaps that little ladybug was trying to tell me something.

Currently my delightful child does not like to share my attention of affection. She is also very speech delayed and gets frustrated trying to communicate. However, I believe every child is unique and different and will speak when they want. I mean hey I do enough speaking for the two of us! She is saying a few two-syllable words, which is great. She absolutely understands everything and sometimes she amazes me with the funny things she does. Like today, she put her little socks in her shoes just the way I do for her. She dresses herself, puts her shoes on and combs her hair. She watches attentively at everything I do and tries to be a big girl by imitating me. You are such a beautiful child Kira.

February 2009-I am consumed with love for Kira and can’t help but admit it! While she does the funniest things to entertain herself and me, she’s starting to talk also, which is a big milestone for her. She can clearly say “no” in the dainty voice of hers, and has a vocabulary of about 28 words (very good from ten in September). She knows her colors, shapes and can do calculus without a calculator (just making sure this isn’t a boring post). I am a proud momma, knowing that Kira’s cleft palate isn’t standing in her way of verbally making her point known.

March 2009– Kira continues to amaze us everyday! She’s a bright, engaging child, who is now well on her way to speaking. After an early intervention evaluation determined she didn’t need speech therapy, we took the suggestion of the CHOP Adoption team to seek out a private medical speech evaluation as Kira was displaying immense frustration at her inability to communicate. We made the appointment and wouldn’t you know it…she started imitating more and more sounds and words.

Normally children have a vocabulary of about 200 by age two. Her speech evaluation determined she fell in the average range compared to children who have only heard English for 15 months. In just a short couple of months her vocabulary is now approaching 90 words and she’s making two-word sentences.

It’s been a little more than a year since the day we met our daughter.  She has come a long way, from her growth and nutritional status to her overt connection and bond with me. I love her so much; I simply can’t put it into words. She’s the center of my life, my world and a dream come true. We are so happy we chose this path to adopt our daughter and now look forward to providing her a normal, loving and happy life!